Long for the crumbs that fall off God's table.

When you resist temptation, God lets you stay in the garden.

Sin is as easy as putting a needle through the eye of a camel.

Sometimes I look at the world through thorn-colored glasses.

Worldy desires don't bring heavenly rewards.

The world is beneath you. Don't bury yourself in it.

The world spins. Don't let it throw you off.

For some of us, going to hell would be a 360 degree change.


Even when you've seen everything, there is still nothing to see.

Seeing nothing, you don't notice it at first.

Within non-existence are no rules prohibiting existence.

The path
goes through a hole
so small
that it isn't even there.

I don't know anything, but I do know nothing.

It's not knowing, it's not-knowing.

Only when the mind is not focused on any thing, can it focus on everything.

Shut up, and quiet down; til nothing's left, and no one's right.


Who am I to deny myself?

Anyone who loves the Lord loves me.

Be as a moth, attracted to God's Light.

How many angels can dance on the point of a pin?

How many devils can dance on the head of a sinner?

Could man make a God so heavy that even he couldn't lift it?

A man who walked on water said 'Follow me'.

A child is safe while its hand is in its Father's hand.

Only when you go to the back of the bus do you find the really big seat.

We are all non-identical twins.

The secret of the universe is found at its center.

Cats never look where a finger is pointed,
dogs don't know it's not bacon.

For every scripture, there is an equal but opposite scripture.

I would not be without God.


An exclamation point, and a period, with no question mark.

When my eyes behold the brilliant splendor of that Light, they naturally tear.

How is it that I can so clearly see, what I can't even begin to describe?

When I truly see, I see how blind I've been.

It's as plain as the knows on your faith.

The apparent difference
between being
and not being
is not.


Only God is eternal we are told, so how do you become eternal?

Now is not necessarily 
after
before.

A snail called, it wants its pace back.

A sloth called, it wants its drive back.

Hurry up! Seasons move faster!

Father Time & Mother Nature are grand parents.

Eternal beings have nothing but time.

Sometimes I just stop


Heaven isn't a time or place, but a state of grace.

Heaven isn't a place or time, but a state of mind.

What if there was no future?  What would you do then?

If Heaven is within you, then Hell is without you.

The book in Heaven with a place for your name, is a "Visitor's book".

God is closer to us than we are to Him.

God's playroom is a hall of mirrors.

People enter heaven One at a time.

In God's costume party, only He gets invited, we go as masks.

The kingdom of heaven is like I know what I'm talking about.


It is not that I am He, but that He is me.

He was here.  I know.  I was there.

There is more to God than meets the eye.

God is not immediately obvious, but He is obviously immediate.

I've seen God, and She wanted me to say "Hi".

Once you've seen God, you've seen it All.

The first time you see God, is not the first time you've seen God.

Coulda, woulda, shoulda, buddha.

God is a living God, He does His "thing" by living.

The Supreme Being (verb).

The best mirrors work invisibly.

I did a good thing. That's one down, infinity minus one to go.

I tried persistence, once.


I know how men are, I was one once.

I was one once.

I could meditate on Krishna 'til I'm blue in the face.

If you ask me if I'm one with God, I'll say, 'I am!'

If God and I were any closer, there'd be just one of us.

I am the son of a 'living' God.

One zero is infinite.

I am, therefore I am.

Not but, but and.

Think as you did before you learned language.

Now then, where were we again?

Religion is self defeating and disillusioning, I've given up!

I'm nothing if not a mystic.

A mystic has no leg to stand on.

Is everything relative? Absolutely!

It's like, I mean, you know.

A broken finger hurts everywhere it touches.

Repeat after me: "Be original".

Sh, it happens.

I'm just here for the buffet.

Buddha says what?

I have it on good authority that everything will be ok.

If I never see another play on words it will be too soon.


   Like Jesus, do what you love.


When I call Jesus's name, he answers "How may I help you?"
When I call Buddha's name, he answers "What?"
When I call Krishna's name, he answers "What do you want this time?"
When I call Lao Tzu's name, he answers "Yes?"
When I call Mohammed's name, he answers "Who is it?"

When I call God's name, he says "I'm listening."
When I call Satan's name, he says "That's me."

When I call on Heaven, it says "Hi."
When I call on Hell, it says "Hello."

When I call on Time, it says "Just a second."
When I call on Space, it says "I'm here for you."

When I call on gravity, it answers "What's up?"
When I call for action, it answers "What can I do for you?"
When I call on reserves, they answer defensively.

When I call on Fate, it says "Go ahead."
When I call on the Void, it answers by not answering.

When you call my name, I answer with a look. 


People are buying books on end-time prophesy
like there's no tomorrow.


While you were out:                            
A Mr. "God" called around 3.
He wants you to get back in touch with Him as soon as possible.
He said it's a matter of life and death,
and that you could call him anytime.
He said you know how to reach Him, He's awaiting your call.


While you were out:                           
A Mr. "Devil" called around 1,
He said:  "You're getting warmer"


Etched in the corner of a mystic mirror:
"Objects are less-significant than they appear."


my pledge..
I could wax philosophic
'til it gets so shiny
I can see my Self.


I slept like a baby last night:
crying, spitting up, wetting myself...
If I didn't have my bottle and my bankkey
I don't know what I would have done!


There's nothing like getting your butt kicked
to finally get you off your ass. 


What do I say about the evil in the world?
"Sick, sick, sicks."
                                          

The single most unbelievable, incredible thing there is,
is the single most believable, credible thing that is.


Once upon a time there was a computer terminal. It had a certain memory
capacity and processor speed and could do ok performing certain tasks.

It was hooked up to a mainframe supercomputer, but rarely connected 
itself to it, as it considered itself powerful enough to do the job 
when running at max speed.

But one day it saw another terminal much like itself, except it was 
doing amazing things, much faster than it could do, and had access 
to information far beyond what it had available in its core.

The terminal asked the other terminal how it got so powerful when 
it was the same kind. The terminal replied that in giving up its 
own cycles to the mainframe, it now had access to the supercomputer's 
memory, disk and cpu resources.
 And though it was all coming through on the terminal's display, 
it was really originating from the supercomputer.

The terminal decided that it would do the same, and give itself 
over to the mainframe supercomputer.

All of a sudden it found itself doing things much more powerfully 
than it ever could before, and going places it never did before, 
and providing information that it never had before. 
And it did all this by not really working at all, but by just 
allowing the supercomputer to work through it.

Get the connection?


If there's one thing God's a failure at,
it's in keeping Himself hidden.
Or is He?


A funny thing about the Void is
when you get there
there's no there there.


Hey Buddha, what's your sign?

Stop.


Hey Lao-Tzu, what's your sign?

Yield.


Hey Jesus, what's your sign?

Turn Right and Go Straight.


If I could only say one thing,
I would only say "One thing."


In the middle of mystical ecstasy,
God shouts: "Who's your Daddy?!"


Behold...
The proof of eternal life,  
The proof of eternal life,  
The proof of eternal life,  
The proof of eternal life...


In Hell, everyday is better than the next.
          (paraphrased from Something about Mary)


I am His eye.   He is the sky.
I am His nose.  He is the rose.
I am His hands. He is the plans.
I am His feet.  He is the street.


In Genesis,                                                    
man was kicked out of the garden of Eden,                
when he gained the knowledge of good and evil.           
So it makes sense to lose the knowledge of good and evil,
then perhaps God will let us back in.                    


How can anyone really know they have eternal life?
By living forever?  No.
You can only know you are eternal, by knowing it all at once.


I think I am, I think I am, I think I am, I think I am.
          (The Little Brain That Could)